Scott Cheatham’s Weblog

Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall.
(Proverbs 16:18 ESV)

Last week, another high profile pastor was forced to resign his church due to sexual indiscretion with his personal assistant.  I say “high profile” lightly because I think the “rock star” mentality many of us in ministry give certain peers is unwarranted.  The very attitude such idol worship can create ultimately leads to the destruction of the person as witnessed in this case.  In fact the pastor himself admitted his ego had gotten in his way and he was selfish.  I am thankful that his public admission was written in a humble tone and acknowledged the path that led to his tryst and subsequent resignation.

My purpose here is not to criticize nor is it to point out one man’s sin.  The reality is each of us in ministry is not worthy of the banner we hold high each weekend.  We ALL have sinned and without God’s gracious forgiveness, we would get what we rightly deserve.  I feel for this man.  I have followed his ministry as a pastor and church planter because I’m doing the same thing and am always curious as to what works when you are trying to reach people.  Some of my ministry friends elevated him to a much higher pedestal than I would think even he would be comfortable with.  That’s the danger of being a church planter.   We can get quite caught up in numbers and how many we “baptize” each month/week/year and forget why it is we do what we do.  The pressure to sustain that kind of momentum can get dangerously high and force us to take our eyes off the one thing that WILL sustain us and that is our personal relationship with Christ.  In those moments of high stress, high pressure, and low quiet time with God we leave ourselves open to attack and a pretty woman is always hard to ignore if you are red-blooded man.

I write this as a warning to all of us to beware.  My brother who fell here has already asked forgiveness, has already been forgiven by God, and is on the road to repairing his relationship with his family.  My prayer is for their family first.  The church he led is hurt and rightly so but it will recover.  I pray for that too but first and foremost I lift my brother up to God and ask for peace for him.  I ask for quiet place alongside a stream where God can meet with him and fill his soul with the good things of the Lord.  I pray for a strong arm on his shoulder from God to get him back on the path of service to others.  I pray also for the assistant in this story.  She has been wounded also.  I pray that God restores her and that she will allow His forgiveness to flow in.  In the process, I pray for the community of faith in the blogosphere who knew this man to join collectively and pray for him and not berate him for a mistake that all of us have the potential to make.

When I was getting ready to leave for Denver, I had a pastor friend of mine in Missouri speak to me about such “accidents”.  It was there, he gave me some imperatives in ministry that I’ve never forgotten…

• Do not EVER meet with a woman privately or publicly by myself.  Always have my wife and/or her husband (if married) with them.
• Do not EVER travel with a woman unless there are peers with us (so you are never alone).
• Never discuss family problems (and they happen in pastor’s families too!) with a member of the opposite sex.
• Date your wife!
• Romance your wife!
• ..and never EVER say you wouldn’t do something because you do not know what you would do if the circumstances were just right (in other words, read the proverb I posted at the beginning and apply!)

Can I ask you, my reader, to take a moment and life up this man, his family, and those involved?  You do not need to know his name although I’m sure many of you do.  But as a body of believers, let’s not shoot our wounded but rather, join in prayer as best we can to ask for his restoration and for him to be made whole again.

Thank You.